Home Retreat. Day 1

lizshine74by lizshine74

In A Room Of Your Own, Retreat.

Close-up definition word “focus” French

Yesterday I hosted a solstice party for family and friends. As I reflect on the day, I witness one of the biggest culprits to my concentration. I love the idea of hosting, but sometimes in the moment of being the host, I get too caught up in worries to enjoy the time I’ve created for connection and being in relationship. I spend the time worrying that I should do this or should do that and so don’t really just be and enjoy. This did not happen yesterday. It almost did, though. The worries were hovering there, kept trying to get my attention, but somehow I was able to recognize them there without letting them have the run of the place. There’s a trick I picked up from my yoga teacher where when certain unhelpful, destructive thoughts pop in, just to say to yourself, “that’s a thought”. I’ve started practicing this and it’s working surprisingly well.

In writing as well we can spend too much of our time worrying what our guests will think of us if we do this or do that. The guests in this case are our imagined future readers. While I do think it’s helpful to ask yourself in the process of writing, “Is that true?”, I don’t think it’s helpful to worry about what others are going to think.

So today, we’re going to concentrate. We’re going to use our timer and stay in just one thing at a time. We’re going to keep the response “that’s a thought” handy for any disruptive thinking that may show up uninvited. We’re going to breath and take breaks. We’re doing six focused hours, however long that takes us. I’ll check back in when I’m done to let you know how it went.

Six focused hours later…

I’ve been trying for 8 hours, and I’ve only done 2 hours of deep focus. It’s not that I haven’t tried. As luck would have it, I woke with a headache so sharp I spent thirty minutes lying in bed with an ice ball held to my temple in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other. Eventually, I was able to get going. At around noon, I took a break to walk the dogs and make a second pot of coffee because I was nodding off at the keyboard. I know these symptoms well. These are two examples of the insanity that is perimenopause. Headaches and a tiredness so tired I feel like I’ve been drugged or am at the tail end of an all-nighter. Needless to say, I’m not sure I’ll get to six hours today, but I am still here, trying, and despite the tiredness and the headache I’ve been fending off, I finished one of my writing goals. I didn’t expect to do that the first day even if I was able to put in six focused hours. So, I’ll keep going and I’m content with what I’ve done for the day already. I’ve still got a few hours to keep at it and a new day tomorrow. I’ll check back in tomorrow on the topic of delight.

I also work as a writing coach and love helping writers gain confidence, set goals, and develop their work. For more information on coaching, email me at eatyourwords.lizshine@gmail.com.

lizshine74

lizshine74

Liz Shine teaches high school English, writes, edits, and coaches other writers from her home in Olympia, WA. When she begins to feel overwhelmed by it all, she simply looks up at Mount Rainier in the distance and gets back to work. If that fails, she heads to the ocean. She is a founding editor at Red Dress Press. Her Substack Make Time is her gift to writers, like her, trying to magic time in this crazy, busy world. All of those posts are cross-posted on the blog here. You can see more of her writing at lizshine.com and find her on Instagram {@lizshine.writer} cooking, traveling, and in other ways seeking moments of awe. She has been an active participant in communities of writers since the early 1990s. She’s learned that two things feel truly purpose-driven in life: writing and coaching other writers. In the in between (because one cannot be driving for a purpose every moment), she enjoys looking for wonder and connection. She is a lifelong yoga student, an enthusiastic walker along streets and trails, and an amateur gardener and vegetarian cook. She lives in Olympia, WA in the USA. She believes in the power of practice and has been practicing writing since some time in the early 90s when she became an adult in the rain-soaked city of Aberdeen. Writing began with journaling, as a way to understand a confusing, sometimes violent coming-of-age. She writes mostly fiction, some nonfiction, and poetry, and holds an MFA from Pacific Lutheran University’s Rainier Writers Workshop. She has published in Shark Reef, Dual Coast, and Blue Crow Magazine. She is a founding editor at Red Dress Press.